We started the day by renting a Honda Jazz! Teeny little car but fitted us and that's all that we needed. I think it was 1300THB which is about £26 inc baby seats and as far as I know, the fuel. We headed off with an idea of heading from where we're staying in Bang Tao (half way up west coast) to Phuket Town for lunch and down to the beaches on the south. We got to Heroines Monument and see signs for the waterfall at Bang Pae so we change the plan...
We get there and realised it was going to cost about £12 and we couldn't decipher if we'd get Joey up, we talked him down to £8 (400 baht), drove around the corner and the car park was just there! We were a bit worried that it would be a big hike and we'd have to carry Joey but there was a sign for the waterfall saying 300meters and a local guy said that the path would take a pram. I just can't decide why the f*** he'd say that to us! It was bad enough to say it was 300 meters when it was a 15 minute hike but to take a pram up the side of a waterfall - git! (Extreme frustration - check). Nevertheless, Jim carried Joey and I carried the pram, between us we guided Ellie and although it wasn't quite the tropical waterfall I was expecting it was lovely, you could walk around inthe pools at the top and you really felt like you were In a jungle waterfall. We treked backdown and headed to phuket town for lunch.
It's apparently not very popular with tourists and you can understand. There appeared to be nothing to draw your eye as we drove in but once out of the car, the old town which was filled with chinese new year lanterns was quite atmospheric to walk through. We stopped for lunch at a covered street cafe and had four yummy meals and drinks for £4! It was incredibly clean and welcoming and the lady cooking absolutely fell in love with Joey!
After this we decided to take the drive to Nai Harn beach in the south. When we got there jim asked where his swimming shorts were, i just hadn't thought to pack them - eeek. A tad miffed he strolled off to one of the beachside stalls to buy new ones and Ellie and Joey charmed a Thai family in a van next to us, they all had a cuddle with Joey and then gave Ellie a magnum icecream! We couldn't even communicate properly and one of them had given up their ice cream to give to Ellie, amazing. (Extreme kindness - check) we visited the beach, it was lovely but not as exciting as I'd hoped. Not a jot of shade which is more and more problematic for us, although the pair of them just love to sit where the waves lap; Joey grazes on as much sand as he can get away with, Ellie digs holes, it's all very lovely, but, can only stay out for an hour tops really.
On our way back to the hotel we had to drive along the coast through Kata beach, Kamala (where we've stayed before) then the infamous Patong. Holy sh*t! What a dump, like the really nasty bits of Mallorca. It took us probably an hour to drive along about a half a mile section of "the strip" as a road was closed, Joey was screaming, we were hot and tired, it was rubbish. Eventually we decided that I should get out with Joey, go to a shop for refreshments and walk along side Jim in the car. I got out and with that, the traffic cleared!! I did my best to remember the reg of our renter and hoped the police let Jim stop further up. When I caught up, Ellie told me to "watch the wee!" Jim then told me of our current status, Ellie decided she needed a wee, couldn't possibley wait so he stopped on the side of the road outside a "massage parlour" which i believe we call brothels in the UK and weed in the gutter, much to all the ladies sitting around outside's delight. He then started the car up and it didn't..... We broke down outside of a brothel with them telling us to move (restricting their view) and we were a crying, hot, hungry bunch of PBs (extreme concern... Check) we knew it was going to be a nightmare getting anything solved so I took the kids up the road for a walk for twenty minutes hoping the engine would cool, Jim avoided eye contact with the pack of women and we all kept our fingers crossed! We got back, a taxi driver had come over to help, turned the ignition and YAAAAAAY it started! We headed off as quickly as possible stopping at a variety of shops on the way to get beer, Thai elections meaning you officially can't buy alcohol for 24 hours, managed to get some and got back to the hotel about 7, needless to say, we all got in the pool, it was amazing! Final kind act of the day, someone had left a spade and a toy car outside our room, I'm not sure who but it made our day! We went back to our always a great dish restaurant at Baan Puri, where we were advised that as "farrang". (What the Thai call tourists, what my dad calls groccles) we shouldn't mention anything, what they don't know won't hurt, especially as it cooled down and was fine. To be fair, they probably don't have the "forty point check" that I lived by previously in my life!
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